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Weird things that happen when you leave Yorkshire

Weird things that happen when you leave Yorkshire

I don’t think I knew just how Yorkshire I was until I ventured out of the motherland more frequently. I went to Uni in Lincoln for one year, but in the midst of students from all over the country, my Yorkshireness didn’t really stand out as being that unusual.

Last year I moved to Manchester, and my Yorkshireness has become not just something that appears to very noticeable, but something that I’m also very proud of.

Here are some weird things I have noticed since leaving Yorkshire

1. Eye Spy – You’ll never guess what they can see when they have weird names for everything. I spent 30 minutes trying to guess what my Prestonion boyfriend could see beginning with M, despite the fact I could blatantly see the clothes horse in the corner, how the hell was I supposed to know that people from Lancashire call it a maiden…..

2. The Bread Debate – No matter how long I spend here, I just can’t order a bacon barm, it’s a bloody butty, and I don’t care if I get funny looks when I say it. Also, I will continue to order a toasted currant teacake, because if I don’t specify currant, I wouldn’t expect there to be currants in it! It’s weird over here, barm = teacake, teacake = currant teacake, and I don’t like it.


3. Fish & Chips – Fish and chips over here is just traumatising, don’t even bother, if you really want some, go back to Yorkshire. Firstly, they don’t even have proper chippies here, instead, they’re weird Chinese/Fish & Chip hybrid shops, so your curry sauce is Chinese curry, and they don’t know know what bits or scraps are. Also, they’ve never heard of a fish butty, they look at you funny, so you have to order a ‘barm’ and fish separate, and make your own at home. Lastly, you’re not allowed to put your own salt and vinegar on, they take great offence at this, but I do it anyway, because I’m Yorkshire, and I don’t care. Also, they don’t do fish cakes, or chats. And the fish is not from Whitby.

4. Getting a flat car battery – Getting a flat battery isn’t that big of a deal in Yorkshire, you can usually just push start the car as a quick fix and get the battery checked out when you can make it to a garage. In Manchester it’s not that easy. Last year my battery died in my car, so I thought, ‘Oh, I’ll just push start it down a hill’, but then I thought, where’s the nearest hill, and I didn’t think I could push the car from Salford to Oldham. I now have jump leads in the boot, just in case.

5. Snow – There isn’t any, yet you’ll still hear people talking about that one day 5 years ago when they had really bad snow and couldn’t get in to work. That one day was the equivalent of a light spread in Yorkshire, over here they panic before it even starts to stick. These people would never survive Queensbury in winter.

6. The price of beer – If you’re going to leave Yorkshire, juts give up on the nights out now. There’s no more Acca with 50p drinks over here, instead it’s Northern Quarter with it’s £4 a pint minimum or you have to brave it with the students and feel old. At least in the Acca the grannies made you feel young!

7. Your Accent – Leaving Yorkshire you suddenly realise that you do have an accent. Prepare to have random people repeat everything you say back to you in an over the top Yorkshire accent, with the addition of extra t’s.

8. People are less friendly – Don’t bother saying ‘How do?’ to people, they either don’t understand you, or don’t want to know.

9. Tea – It’s just a drink outside of Yorkshire, everyone else’s evening meal seems to be dinner, even though this is wrong, because why would you have dinner ladies if dinner wasn’t 12pm, they think this is just lunch.

10. Yorkshire Puddings – Outside of Yorkshire these only appear on Sundays and accompany beef, (if you’re lucky) the art of having the Yorkshire Pud with any roast seems to be lost outside the motherland.

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